Theres something quite exciting about getting a booking on a well known seafront restaurant you've not tried before, especially on a Saturday in the summer.
Margate is such a fantastic place to wander around, browsing the shops, or bar hopping kinda browsing is my thing.
Margate has a stunning golden sand beach, its sweeping coastline is hugged by the harbour wall. The harbour wall itself is alive with bars, galleries and people. It's buzzing.
What a setting for a fantastic seafood restaurant, and The Bouy and Oyster is not only one of the newest kids in town, its also one of the biggest restaurants on Margate seafront.
It is a majestic building
Incredibly on a sunny day like today we were lucky to get a glorious spot on its balcony.
Its busy, it smells amazing, its everything you want.
You know you are going to enjoy this treat, and money becomes no object, you know its not going to be cheap, just enjoy it.
The waiting staff are well drilled, drinks order taken in a flash, with menus in hand our eyes dart over the options, there are ooos and ahhhs from my table...
I'm looking at it like I've been pranked.
The menu is sadly so transparent, what lies under the words really isnt impressive.
No, that's harsh.. I shouldnt judge... But the small plates (starters in old money) are a tenner plus so my spidey senses are tingling..
Its not the price I have the problem with, its what you are getting for it, this just smacks of margins and gross profits.
What was I expecting?
I look again at the options "sea food cuterie" smoked or cured seafood.... With creme friache... you know what that's going to be... smoked salmon and a dollop of creme friache and maybe a couple of bits of samphire to make you think its special...
The £16 price tag for this is on the utterly shameless side of enthusiastic.
So out of the options I choose the squid in salt and pepper... Unfortunately for them it's a personal go to favorite of mine... Its £10.50 so its strong given I could walk to a half a dozen other eateries which are all selling this, for less...
But you get what you pay for, right?
Due to its grand position, people will say ah, you are paying for the location... I prefer to pay for food, nether the less, I'm also paying for the je ne sais quoi... And when it arrives its clear I am paying more for the je ne sais quoi than I gambled for.
Its the tiniest of portions.
So just get on with it, and nibble. The seasoning was reasonable. The squid itself had the texture and resistance of elastic bands.
Squid is very cheap, it's a popular bait to use for fisherman, so where is the value on the plate?
The skill? Not really, it's just sliced and dusted in seasoning and deep fried..
Ah it's the je ne sais quoi, again!
So, you are in a sea side sea food restaurant, would it be fair to assume that the produce you are offered is localy caught and in season?
Theres nothing on this menu that tells a story, its just words, no passion. I might as well be sitting in a KFC.
I have read about local chefs that are doing some incredible food based around foraged seafood and herbs. None of that here.
This smacks of what reads well, and put that in the menu... And buy it from wherever you can get it cheapest, work out a decent profit margin and add a tenner. Such a shame.
Im starting to scrutinise the relevance of the star ingredients... Yes the actual fish.
Wheres the cod from? Why is the sea bass on the menu when it's only caught locally a couple of months a year?
Squid from.. Well you can't really catch squid in these waters, they are caught by huge trawlers across the world somewhere, frozen and shipped back.
Smoked salmon from... Well where is that from? Let's go back to the menu option of smoked or cured charcuterie..
Is it really too hard to smoke your own fish?
This has me thinking, why are they not smoking their own seafood using traditional methods on site?
I would pay to experience the flavour of proper smoked fish in a proper seafood restaurant, and I would stand by their side waving the flag in harmonic celebration of real quality local smoked seafood...
Where's the love, wheres the respect, wheres the passion?
Is it too much like hard work?
What am I paying for?
The mains are eye blistering prices, no surprises. I scrutinise the descriptions...the only smoking that happens here is the smoke they put in front of your eyes. It's just lazy.
In fact the reality is that pretty much everything is on the menu to fill a gap, to cover bases, to crowd please.
This is not a local seafood champion restaurant, its just using seafood as its unique selling point and I think that is a bit sad.
I'm taking no chances, I opt for the dressed crab, which is a bit of a treat I wouldnt normally buy at home, I know what I am getting, but im really hoping they do something with it that ive not seen before.
From my position I look across the bay to the harbour I see manning seafood stall... They sell dressed crabs for less than a quarter of the price.
Please don't be exactly what you can buy there and simply presented on a bed of leaves.. Please!
But I know its what I'm getting, I have no faith, and on that point I am not disappointed.
Dressed crab in shell, just the way they bought it in, now presented on a plate at a 5x cost mark up with absolutely no shame.
My fellow diners didn't share my pessimism, after lots of ooos and ahhhs they all went for different dishes which were desperately average when they arrived.
One menu option that stood out was a selection of battered fish.
Had I made a mistake, should I have been less judgemental and gone against my pessimism, taken my medicine and be grateful for it?
Whether I should or shouldn't have been grateful is irrelevant, when the dish came out I saw instantly that I had dodged a bullet, there was less than half the fish on a plate that you would find in a petes fish factory £5 special take away just a minutes walk away.
Oh and im not looking at a plate of food that looks like it could have been featured on a Master Chef The Proffesionals skills test either... Its just average food dressed up.
Clearly I expect too much. Maybe I should allow myself to be distracted by the words and eat those instead of the food?
Why can I not go to a restaurant that specialises in seafood and be impressed by what they put on a plate?
Why didn't I eat here and get the impression that thought, care, skill was applied in creating my meal?
I will hazard a guess. Its all about making money, duh that's what any business wants and needs to do, but their model is to turn over the tables quickly, provide produce or expensive products in smaller portions for as much as they dare charge, and people will keep coming because of the position and branding.
That's their business model.
Margate is rich in seafood serving restaurants. Some of them are good. It doesn’t need an overpriced bad one.
HOW DOES IT SCORE
1) Is it to the expected standard? Unfortunately it falls well short of the image it presents. NO POINT
2) Does it do something that you have always wanted to try? If you are easily pleased you will take your pill, smile and swallow. There are no rays of inspiration here. NO POINT
3) Is it fairly priced? Its priced to please the accountant. NO POINT
4) Cleanliness, including customer toilets. Excellent. ONE STAR
5) Service. Excellent. ONE STAR
CONTRIBUTING EVIDENCE
A) Does it have a clear and relevant identity? Absolutely, It knows exactly what it is, and promotes itself brilliantly.
B) Does it stand out for quality and standards? It stands out, but for all of its refinery its menu is lacking in intgrity.
C) Is there areas of the business that someone else does better? ANGELAS is all about the food, and not je ne sais quoi
D) Does it diversify? It doesnt really need to, so no excuses for a menu designed for making maximum profit.
E) Will customers return without hesitation? People with money to splash out because they buy je ne sais quoi will return. Food lovers will go down the road.
A DISAPPOINTING MEAL, PAINFUL PRICES. THE BOUY AND OYSTER CAN ONLY BE AWARDED TWO STARS TODAY FOR DOING THE BARE BASICS.
I WANTED TO BE ABLE TO RAVE ABOUT THE MENU, BE AMAZED AT THE FOOD, BUT I DONT THINK THESE GUYS WANT TO TAKE IT THERE.
I THINK THEY JUST KEEP PUTTING OUT MEDIOCRE FOOD WITH FANCY DESCRIPTIONS AND AMBITIOUS PRICES BECAUSE THATS ALL THEY NEED TO DO, AND PEOPLE WILL LAP IT UP.
Comments
Post a Comment
Thankyou for your contribution.
"I Expect Just What I've Always Expected - For You To Make Up Your Own Damn Mind. Believe Me, Or Don't."